here to vent all my frustrations about my current AT room-mate.
being nice to her just doesn't do you good.
and she just makes me dislike AT even more.

she bangs her books and even things as light as papers can make damn loud noise.
she drops a hell lot of things be it from drawers or when she sleeps.
she kicks the cupboard between our beds damn loudly at night.
she closes the wardrobe door and the main door damn loudly.
she doesn't lock the main door when she sleeps last.
and the list goes on and on.

moral: never get yourself a AT room-mate.

what the hell!

completed my hedge accounting quiz today.
last quiz of my entire uni life.
though i studied quite hard for it.
i still lost to my careless mistakes.
disappointed.
but i am feeling better now:)
just have to work hard for my remaining 60%, i guess!

hmmm...kinda worried about my 304 quiz results.
coz the lowest was 61 and when my tutor was looking at that mark, he was looking at the front few on the list:( which happens to be where i am on the name list.
i hope i am thinking too much.
*prays*
the module i quite liked.
i don't want to do so badly.

one more korean listening to go.
after which, it will be intensive mugging for my last few papers in NTU!
jiayou friends.
jiayou dear.
and jiayou to me!

when thing always go wrong or turn out unexpectedly when u least expect them to, how will you feel?
it was once, twice and then it became so frequent that u gradually give up on trying, give up on expecting.
and u have to admit, afterall things all just beyond one's control.
without expectations, there won't be disappointments.

what if one day you got tired of waiting?
waiting for miracles to happen.
waiting for the right person to appear.
waiting for hardwork to reap results.
waiting for someone to turn up or waiting for something to happen.
will you still be able to hold on to your initial faith and continue waiting?
people say, good things go to people who wait.
but sometimes, waiting just gives you zero yield.

i am learning to expect little for others, and lesser from myself.
i am learning to give up on waiting for things that i don't see a point in anymore.
perhaps, i'll regret them.
but who knows? until you've tried?
it's only through experience that you learn.

got back my cbc801 mid-term results.
it was below average but i wasn't too disappointed with it.
esp. when i know i only put in 50% or less of effort.

coming to the end of my undergraduate life.
and my final phase as a student.
6 years in ynps.
4 years in tms.
2 years in tjc.
and my last 3 years in nbs.

i must admit i ain't a smart person since young.
but i always believe in trying and working hard to make up for it - Dilligence, you could call it.
that's why i have always put in my 100% in my studies all the way from pri to uni. frankly speaking, i won't let myself enter any exams feeling too unprepared. although diligence doesn't necessarily equate to results.
i still held on to this belief all along.
until i got into uni.

uni made me see how insignificant i was in my academic compared to those 'smarties' from rj, hc, vj and poly students.
there were times i got angry with myself over results.
there were times i hated myself for being dumb when my friends can just not study and score in exams.
there were times i felt inferior.
but i always tell myself nobody could excel in everything.
self-consolation? i don't think so.
i might not be very good in studies.
but i have my own capabilities.
and i am happy with who i am now.

Moral of all these is:
Stop comparing yourself with others. You are you, and you have your own abilities. Be confident! You only have one life to live. and it's up to you to decide how you want to live it.:)

sometimes, i really get quite amused by my '小强精神':P
就是怎样都打不死。
i fall down easily.
but i always pick myself up after that.

to all the smarties in this world, treasure what god has given you and learn to make full use of it wisely.
to people who are average like me, just keep trying.
coz i believe one fine day, your hard labour will eventually reap results.
though you might have to wait.
but good things come to those who wait, isn't it?

for my last sem.
i am going to try my best.
do my best.
and let's hope my last sem will be the best sem of my uni life!
JIAYOU ELAINE!
and to all my beloved friends who are in their final sem.:)
continue to believe in yourself no matter how hard/harsh reality is.
there's always sunshine after each downpour.

behind all those smiley faces, do you know how much tears are shed to pretend that one is alright?
that feeling really sucks.

i feel like banging my head against the wall!
when there's alot to do, my brain just cant function.
when there's alot to do, i feel damn sleepy.
can somebody enlighten me on why do i feel so tired recently?
disappointed with myself.
yet trying to fight the pessimistic part in me.

uncovering my family's health history.
perhaps it's better to know less sometimes.
sighs.
sighs.
sighs.

feeling very tired these few days.
and my threshold seems to be getting earlier and earlier too.
raaar! irritated by this.
which means i can't do work at night nowadays.
i guess my body is retaliating against me.
can somebody tell me why i feel so angsty these days?
:(

finally settled my part for grad trip.
finished my 304 part and my korean kw.
304 edit, 306 sls and my korean essay for this weekend!
:)

say HI! to my cute baby cousin, jaylyn:)